From the category archives:

love

“Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world. How come?”

-Dr. Wayne Dyer

There is a story about a guy who lives in a small town where everyone is mean, people are inconsiderate, and where they are just down right rude.  He hates his small town.  When he finally gets a chance to get out of his town, he jumps on it.

When he arrives to the new town that will be his home, he stops an old lady on the street and asks, “What are the people like here?” She responds, “What where they like where you came from?”  Which he replies, “They were mean, inconsiderate and rude.”  She smiles, “They are exactly the same here.”

She was a wise old women.  She knew that we create our world.   For her the town was a lovely community, where people were great friends and where people were kind and considerate.

She understood that it is our perspective that shapes our world.  He had come to their town with the same judgments, the same preconceived notions about people and the same scars that he had in his last town. It was his inside world that shaped his outside world.

What world do you live in?

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“You are never responsible for the actions of others; you are only responsible for you. When you truly understand this, and refuse to take things personally, you can hardly be hurt by the careless comments or actions of others. You can travel around the world with your heart completely open. You can say, “I love you,” without fear of being rejected. You can ask for what you need without guilt or self-judgement. You can choose to follow your heart always, and live with inner peace and happiness.” – Don Miguel Ruiz

It’s not about you

Today, one of my dear friends sent me a truly inspiring and wise article from the New York Times,  Those Aren’t Fighting Words, Dear.  The article is written by a woman, Laura A Munson, who chose love over selfishness. Who chose acceptance over suffering. Who chose happiness over pain.

After 20 years of marriage her husband came home one day and told her that he didn’t love her anymore and was moving out.  She refused to believe him. She had the wisdom and love to not take it personally.  She had decided that she was committed to ending her suffering, and that her happiness was not dependent on things that were outside her control.

So, instead of getting upset, she asked, ” What can we do to give you the distance that you need, without hurting the family?”

She wisely writes, “This man was hurting, yet his problem wasn’t mine to solve. In fact, I needed to get out of his way so he could solve it.”

Sure enough, he woke up.  He realized the source of his pain, because he was given the space and the grace to grow.

She knew it was not about her.  Nothing ever is.  Check yourself.  Are you caught up in somebody elses drama?  Are you taking responsibility for your own happiness?

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